My most favorite and cherished aspect of  BDSM is the depth to which I was able to dive below its surface. As I’ve ventured forth and deeper, I’ve gained invaluable tools imperative to better understanding BDSM in today’s world. From physical skills like rope, to internalizing consent as a multifaceted notion, there are a litany of tools to be discovered. One of the most important tools I gained, however, is the ability to examine BDSM as it intersects with my personal mental health.

Self-awareness means that a person is privy to the the elements that form their identity. It includes feelings, motives, desires and character. I am of the opinion that self awareness also includes cognizance of personal mental health. In the world of BDSM and all it has to offer, there are ongoing discussions about how positive experiences for ones life are only a scene away. 

While BDSM can be full of healing and affirming experiences, unfamiliarity with ones own mental health carries the chance of causing mental discomfort no matter what position is taken be it dominant, submissive or otherwise. For example, as I ventured forth into the kinky abyss, I had to consider how bdsm intersected with my depression, anxiety, ADD and various trauma. I was only able to do this as someone who became better informed about their mental health over time. Before doing the work, there were  a few instances where I, as a top, was complicit in manifesting harm.

By no means am I saying not to play because one is of neuroatypical experience. Rather, I am saying that having a good time and truly benefitting from positive areas of kink beckons for familiarity with personal mental health, lest you create negative experiences. This allows you to effectively communicate your needs first and foremost to yourself and then to others, which affords you and your play partners the opportunity to be better accommodating in play. Inner work and employing the aid of mental health professionals helps bring about awareness of self. Self awareness is a tool that helps shape your personal brand of BDSM with reverence for your mental health.

Again, healing and positive affirmation exist in BDSM, but as we convey a world of positivity, we must also recall that there is risk involved in all that is done here. The best way to combat and mitigate risk is awareness.